Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Sunday, October 18, 2009
There was a new boy that year, his name was Nick. He was every kind of wrong you can think of, and I knew it too. For some reason I didn't listen to my better judgment and said yes to "being his girlfriend". The same night he asked me, I went to the winter ninth grade night dance. (Nick didn't do the dance thing) Now, up until this point Michael had just sort of been a friend. He was in my English class, and we flirted a little here and there. But it was nothing big. I was not ready for what happened that night. At the dance I was out in the foyer calling Nick and in walked the best looking boy I had ever seen. He was wearing a tight fitting shirt with a pink tie.
My heart pounded in my chest as I tried to figure out who it was. As he walked closer I gasped as I realized it was Michael. Never had I felt this way towards him or any other boy for that matter. I slammed the phone shut and jumped up to talk to him. We flirted for a second and I made him promise to dance one dance with me. I then left him to go be with my friends but he never left my mind. While I was dancing with others, I found my self constantly looking for him. Hoping he would grab my hand and pull my aside. He didn't have to sweep me off my feet cause he had already done that. The D.J. announced that there were only about two or three songs left. I was devastated! "Maybe I came off too strong, maybe I don't look very good tonight, maybe he just had too go home" These were all the thoughts going through my head. I was trying to explain all this to Miranda, my best friend, when she flipped me around. Standing there in all his glory was that beautiful boy. I felt like my heart had left my chest. I felt sick and bursting with joy at the same time.
He asked me to dance with him, took my hand and lead me to the dance floor. In the back of my head I felt a little ashamed... I mean I was Nick's "girlfriend". But I could tell that Michael was so much better in more ways then one. If he would have asked me I would have called Nick right then and just stayed in Michael's arm. Unfortunately, he did not, and the songs as well as the dance ended.
At Miranda s house after, all my friends were telling me how good Michael and I looked together. They were pretty much begging me to leave Nick. I went home considering it, until I found out the next day that Michael was already taken. I was so sad, but I assumed it was for the better. For the next few months a string of events took place. Michael and I continued to grow close by becoming best friends. Nick fought with me so many times and I put up with it to keep myself occupied while waiting for michael. Michael and I would kiss secretly behind the school without anyone knowing. I fell in love with Michael. I was torn between letting him stay happily with his girlfriend and tearing him away to be with me.
This continued for several weeks until the World Fair. He came in the door and my heart did that thing it always does when I see him. By this time I had cut my loses and left Nick once and for all. He walked up to me and told me that he ended it with her! I was ecstatic!! I almost could not control my self I was so happy. But, to my surprise, he did not ask me to be his right away. It did come however, at the next night dance, the spring one, during the song Fall For You. He leaned in close and asked me to be with him. I looked right into his eyes and said yes. We have been inseparable ever since, and that was a year and five months ago! Yes, it has been hard just like any relationship. But he is the one, I just know it.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
I talked to both Ruth and Sari about their confidentiality issues. Ruth told me that the hardest thing for her is her special treatment students. She says that some of them you would not know had anything wrong and it’s hard not to show special treatment. Also, grades are a big one for both. You can not post any grades that have names attached them. They always have to be with student numbers or some other code. You can’t discuss other kids’ grades with a student. It is not as big of a problem, especially in an art class, compared to like a math class.
Monday, October 5, 2009
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Glass is the book that follows Crank. It continues with Kristina/Bree's story of her struggle with the monster. Reading this book has been a very eye opening experience for me. It has made me so afraid of drugs, and in some ways sex. In this book she believes she is in love with this boy. But to me it seems like they are just using each other to get off. Then when the other is gone, they just get it from someone else. I never want that to happen to me. I want every part of my life to be filled with love and true wanting. Whether it is sex or simply just watching late night t.v. I really felt sorry for the girl in this book. I wanted to reach inside the story and shake her. I wanted to beg her to step out of herself for two seconds and look at the mess she has made. However I know that even if I did do that, she would never be able to see what I can see. This book has really wrapped me in its crushing arms and has really made me think. Not only think about what I can do to help people like her, but also think about choices I have made that brought me close to the same fate. It is interesting to see how a happy life can be shattered in one kiss, one hug, or even one word. Ellen Hopkins did a great job at showing this to her readers.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
In both periods there have been some students that have been talking when they are not supposed to be, or when I am talking. I would much rather let them talk, and have them think I am the “cool” teacher. However, I know that I need to enforce the rules the same way the regular teacher would. Every time I have had to ask a student to stop talking or get them back on task it puts me out of my comfort zone. Hopefully that feeling will pass in time, and it will come easy to me. When I see my teachers do it, it looks so easy. I know now that it’s not that way. I really have to assert my self and not let them walk all over me.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Some days I do wish I had a nicer car. My boyfriend has a 2000 white Camaro with some very nice accessories, and his car makes me quite jealous. However, I really appreciate my little Nissan Altima. She has really pulled through and been there for me. Sure she has her problems, but the Camaro does to. It seems to me that the problems on the Camaro are more expensive than my problems on the Altima. I know I should not complain. At least I have a car when some don't. At least my car works and is not just sitting in my drive way. Even though my car has stuggles and gives me a massive head ache, I still love it and will continue to take the best of care for it.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
I have had a great experience these past few days. A lot of what I am doing is what I expected but I never thought I would feel the things I do. The first day was the most nerve racking. I was so scared although I am not sure why. I was introduced as Miss. Reynolds and did a few odd end things like running to get things or taking role. I sometimes find it a little frustrating that I do jobs that maybe a teachers aid would do. When I feel that way, I step back and realize that that is part of the process and I need to accept it. I have made a very good connection with the first teacher, Ruth, but it has been much harder to feel that same way with Sari. I find that Ruth is egger to show me something or tell me how she does things. However I have to push my self with Sari. She is much more passive and I have to ask all the questions and ask for things to do. Because it is a studio class there is a lot of work time, so I have to fill up my time with something. I do think it is still fun. I have learned a lot from both teachers, even if I am asking all the questions. I hope that I will be able to be good at the things I am taking over. I also hope that the students will get more comfortable with me being there. I am sure that they are still not quite used to it.
My work place is quite messy because they are both art studio class rooms. That does make it hard for me to know how to dress. There is a lot of work time which I like and don’t like at the same time. It is nice to be able to walk around the class room and talk to the kids, answer any questions, or just observe them. Also, work time is a great time to talk to the teacher about any questions I have for them. I take notes and while they are teaching a lesson I may jot something down and ask them about it when they are done. It is hard for me to get comfortable in my work place simply because it is my school and these are students my age. I really enjoy being in that situation, however weird that may seem. I like the challenge of getting out of my comfort zone. I am so used to working with little kids because of all my little brothers and sisters; I need the experience of working with teens.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
This is a very moving book. Among the Hidden is a book about a time in the close future when our country became too poor. The president came up with a law that stated that families were only allowed to have two children per family. This way there would be enough food to go around so no one would starve. Even though this law was in place, there were still families that went a head and had more than two. Most only had one more, but a few had two extra. The children that were born after the first two were called shadow children. Mothers had to give birth to them in their homes as not to be found out. The family could never talk about their secret brother or sister and the shadow child could never leave home. In this book, the first in the series, the story focuses on a boy named Luke and his fight to freedom. Now, I know this sounds like a depressing book; sometimes it is. However, with the way that it is written, you get so wrapped up in the story that you don't notice the sadness. Instead you cheer him on as he crosses the field for the first time. You anticipate what will happen between him and Jen, and you grieve with him when he hears the news of her death. You feel for the character. Often I would find my self wondering what I would do in his situation, I don't have an answer. The book ends with Luke leaving home, under a fake I.D., to join an all boys school. A suspenseful ending that goes hand in hand with the rest of the book.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
So, I have this dog named Cooper. His nick name is Bear though. (Well, I am the only one that calls him that.) I love him! He is the cutest little cockier spaniel ever. He is only about 14 weeks old and loves us all to death. His fur is a Carmel chocolate brown with a small patch of white on his nose and on his chest. Kind of like he is wearing it like a scarf or something. However, my favorite part about him is his feet. They are the best. In stead of having straight, normal feet, they point outwards. Almost as if he has ballerina feet. When I have had a really long or hard day he always seems to know. He will run up to me or snuggle in my lap, as cozy as ever, and it just makes me smile. The best is when I am playing with him and he tries to paw my face. I know it does not sound that great, but it makes me feel like he is really enjoying playing with me. It helps me give him more personality. Also, when you are scratching his chin or under his ears, he will wrap his paws around your arm like his doesn't want you to go. He always makes me smile and always makes me feel wanted. Even if no one else does. Sometimes, usually on Saturday, he will some how get into my room while I am still asleep. Even though i know I have a million things on the floor that would interest him, he runs straight to my face. After he gets me up he smashes him self against my head. Or finds a way to get under my covers. When I give him "that look" he gives me a look to. A look that seems to say Please let me stay. I promise I will be good! Some days I do let him stay. But only for a minute or two. He is still a puppy and like most puppies, he does not stay in one place for long. Cooper loves to explore even though he may have just explored it that same morning. Everything seems to fascinate him. Of course, he is not always smiles and giggles. He can get on your nerves. Like when he gets in the trash can and starts ripping up things you really did not want ripped up. Or when he has an "accident" on the carpet in the living room. Especially when he treats your little brothers like chew toys. I guess they kind of had it coming but still, it gets ya ticked. But no matter what my dog does, I still love him to death. And something tells me he loves me to.